Some times I have a hard time figuring out what’s fair game in my relationships to write about. I don’t really poll everyone to find out if they want to be portrayed in my writing, but whether it’s the age or if they are starstruck by the idea of their own thoughts being published, most people don’t mind. They like to talk about their (love) lives and everyone has opinions.

With my personal dealings, in general I tend not to get into the details too much, to protect the feelings of people involved.

But though I confess I have often felt a pang about writing authoritatively on relationships when my own ongoing relationships seemed so confusing, I have been able to separate from my own experience enough to know when I’m onto something more generally true. Much of this perspective comes from talking to people, when they’re interested, about the topics I’m seeking to cover, letting it bounce off the hive mind. I don’t like acting the expert, anyway. But I had to separate my writing from my life more decidedly when I went through a particularly bad breakup. I would not be able to write about it for a few years.

I share part of my story here in the Nov/Dec issue of Industry.